31 Aug 2013

Living with a man with diff religion

Last week, Mr Pocoyo went to visit the nearby mini shop which is located close to our house and I took the opportunity to buy bread and butter for our teabreak. The mini shop is owned by an elderly couple, they're in their mid 80s. 

So, as usual, Mr Pocoyo tried to converse in his memorized-phrase: 

"Po Po ni hao? Ni cher fan ler mah?" 
The Po Po was so pleased and she gave a packet of cookies to Mr Pocoyo. 
(Our friendship with the Po Po started 4 years ago, pocoyo was a new born by then).

After we reached home, Pocoyo quickly opened the packing and placed the cookies in the plate before he ate them. 
"This is like Amah's cookies" Pocoyo remembered his grandma; she used the same cookies for offering (they're Buddhist). 

This is the cookies dulu-dulu. Very old fashioned lol

Pocoyo was right, his grandma used the same cookies for offering. 
As a human being, I really feel that those cookies are not special at all and with all the curiousity, I started to have a Q & A session with my bff (mr boyfriendforever). 

"Honey, why mummy always use this kind of cookies for offering?"
"I think because of long time ago, the ancestors didn't have much choice. Perhaps, it's the symbolic of sending them the cookies they loved when they still alive"

Okay, I was satisfied with his answer. It makes sense.
Then, I remember, during the Chinese New Year (or a day before, I guessed), mummy was working so hard, she prepared roasted duck, roasted chicken and few other dishes. All the food were taken to the table at the main door before daddy started the praying ceremony. Joysticks were burned and the 3 of us (mr bff, pocoyo and I) will be the audience - watching and helping at the same time.

Anyway, the offering practice is an ongoing responsibility by my parents in law, not only during the CNY.
The home based temple is always occupied with food that she cooks together with some fruits (apples and oranges most of the time).

Our mommy is getting so old, she can't even walk fast 
(her first child is above 50yo, I'm not kidding, they're old). 
For me, it was pityful to see her running errands like that at this age. She should be enjoying her golden age. 

Then I had a heart to heart conversation with Mr Bff again about this. 

Me: I think it's time for mummy to think the quickest way to get the food for offering. For me, cooking is so ma fan, you have to do shopping, cleaning, cutting, cooking . It takes time to marinate the roasted chicken too.

Bff: So.. what should be the quickest way? (He smiled)

Me: Something like burger, pizza, or anything which is special but fast. Or, just go to Jusco and buy the whole roasted chicken. What do you think? Does it make sense?

Bff: I actually can't answer you, maybe you should ask mummy instead.

Me: But honey, you know.. asking things related to religion is a bit sensitive, some more, they're old and they'll never understand my curiosity.

Bff: Then, why are you asking me?

Me: Because for me, you are an open-minded person and I believe that when I ask something personal like this, we'll exchange the ideas and knowledge.

Does it make sense to take these food for offering??

OR these pizza? 

And the conversation continued:-

Bff: Do you know that what mummy and daddy doing were simple enough? 

Me: Really? Tell me more please.. 

Bff: Some family will get a special made miniature luxury cars and burn them, sometimes for the younger ones, they'll 'send' them an iphone, tabs or anything that they wanted before they passed. 

Me: Lemme tell you something, I was playing at the kafir graveyard when I was a kid and I saw clothes and umbrella placed there, not burn. The uncle who visited the grave told us that it was sent as a gift. Different huh? 

Bff: Where was that? 

Me: In Bantayan, Tamparuli. Papa got his passion fruit farm there last time, a few meters away from that graveyard. We were there helping him harvesting the fruits during school holiday. 

Bff: That was fun I guess. 

Me: Yes and no. It was hot. Oh ya! You were talking about sending the iphone and other for the youngers. Did they include the charger? I mean.. any specific rules as a guideline? 

Bff: (Laughing) Why don't you ask me if there's any electricity supply in that 'other world'? Your question is funny and it reached the level that I can't answer. You know, sometimes I believe that most of the people that already passed were born and died smart, like doctors or engineers. So, the lifestyle in 'the other world' must have been upgraded too. It's my ideology. 

That was the end of the conversation and I believe that his last answer was merely for entertaining me. Anyway, our differences in our belief make our life more colourful. What we both always emphasize is, religion is exist to urge others about kindness and any other positive attitude and behaviour. It should be taken seriously but not up to the fanatic-pathetic-level.

I think that if I had asked a negative person about this, I might got C4 or, instead of saying "I don't know how to explain", he or she might reply as: 
"You stupid.. you've got nothing else to ask meh??"

Let's be kind :)

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  1. Ya know, whenever we visit my grandpapa's grave, we offered the same cookies too (among other foods). In fact, it's one of my favorite cookie. Love the colors and sugar taste too. *hee*

    I think it'll be weird giving our ancestors pizza, Burger King of KFC as offerings. They're pretty 'old fashioned' I think, so it won't suite their taste bud. lol.

    But honestly, my brother and I brought boxes of soya bean milk once for offering at my late grandpapa's grave. hehehehe

    1. eee.. I don't like that cookies, that's why I was worry that the ancestors might get bored with that too.

      Anyway, KFC shouldn't be in the list, it's too oily.

  2. This is a funny post of your curiousity. I was just like you with similar thoughts. Honestly I do know that there is such things as "ugrade" in food and materials. Just please don't ask me how I know this.....

    1. Okaayyyyyyyyyyy!!! Not gonna ask you, sometimes things should be: "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" :D

  3. hahaha, actually a good question.. this type of biscuit (actually also the marrie biscuit) is like the de facto biscuit for offering.. maybe everyone has been doing the same thing, so it's a tradition?? anyway, nowadays anything can be offered also lah, people are not as strict and are more open minded now.. :)

    1. That marie biscuit is another dull food in my list hahaha

  4. During 'kasih bersih kubur' for my hubby's grandparent, the offering must have 'sasau', chicken, tausa piah and orange fruit. Every year with the same offerings. Hubby told me it's better don't offers them with new things which maybe against their will. So, sa tanya la kunun, mana tau durang pun ada juga permintaan?. The hubby replied made me silent dead 'Well, they will come to our dream if they wish for something. Maybe in your dream too because you're the first daughter in-law in our family'. Dang, Conjuring feeling trus! :P

    1. Ohhh yaaa.. through the dream. I heard about that before. Nah.. first DIL got such responsibility..yg bkn first, bulih guyang kaki :P

  5. The cookies dulu dulu was my fav and those days only white color toppings. Would eat all the 'sweet' stuff first. Can't remember it was used for offering oh oh..

    1. Nowadays the cookies toppings are colorful ehh.. It must be awkward to have that cookies to be served to anyone, lol.. I don't know!!

  6. My mum still practicing the old way lah haha..this kind of colorful biscuits still being offered during the seventh month but not for sweeping tomb day. Don't think my ancestors would enjoy pizzas or burgers haha. We stick to the traditional way..haha. Btw, I don't eat those colorful biscuits.

    Yup agree don't be overly fanatic bout religions.

    1. Your guts seems right, even the elderly in my family circle never like it too.

  7. Actually some are too commercialized dy, simple offerings and a sincere heart is the most important.

    1. "Commercialized" hahahaha

      You're right, sincerity is the most important :)